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This week’s B ME Bites Trivia Question:

Welcome to edition #18 of B ME Bites! This week’s edition explores how embracing self-love and practising self-compassion can lead to more of all the things you want in your life.

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Embracing Self-Love - Being Kind to Yourself

How Practising Self-Love and Compassion Can Help You Create A Life You Love

In a world that often demands perfection and constant achievement, it's easy to be hard on yourself. How far does it get you though? Does it help or hinder your progress? In many instances, it’s actually stopping you from making as much progress as you would, if you chose to be kinder to yourself, rather than beating up on yourself. The beautiful Louise Hay said, “Love is the great miracle cure. Loving ourselves works miracles in our lives.” Such wise and true words! Embracing self-love and being kind to yourself can help you create a life you love, no matter what life throws at you. This week, let's dive into how self-love and self-compassion can positively impact your daily experience and help you create the life you want.

What is Self-Love?

It’s easy to say that you should love yourself more, but what does that actually mean? Self-love is the practice of accepting and appreciating yourself as you are. It involves recognising your worth, treating yourself with kindness, and prioritising your own needs and wellbeing. Self-love is not about being selfish; it's about nurturing your relationship with yourself so you can be the best version of you.

The Positive Effects of Self-Compassion

Now that you’re clearer on what self-love is, why should you practice it? One of the strongest factors in making any change in your life is your WHY. When you have a strong why, you can do anything, so here are some reasons why it would benefit you greatly to start consciously practising self-love if you don’t already do so. If you missed the edition on the importance of your “why”, you can find it in edition #4.

Reduced Stress and Anxiety

Practising self-love helps reduce stress and anxiety. When you treat yourself with kindness and understanding, it's easier to navigate life's challenges without the added pressure of self-criticism. You help yourself, rather than hinder. There’s an old saying that explains it perfectly, “You catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar”. An oldie but a goodie!

Enhanced Self-Esteem

Self-compassion boosts self-esteem by encouraging a positive view of oneself. Accepting your flaws and celebrating your strengths leads to a more balanced and realistic self-image. You’re human and it’s ok if you’re not perfect. You’re perfectly imperfect and the world wouldn’t be the same without you in it, just the way you are.

Better Mental Health

Research has shown that self-love is linked to better mental health outcomes. Those who practise self-compassion are less likely to experience depression and are more resilient in the face of adversity. It makes it much easier to be the bamboo, bending in the wind, rather than the stoic tree trunk that gets ripped out by the roots.

Healthier Relationships

When you love and respect yourself, it sets the tone for how others treat you. Self-love can lead to healthier, more fulfilling relationships because you’re less likely to tolerate disrespect or mistreatment. You radiate out to the world, that which is within you, whether you’re aware of it or not. When you mistreat yourself, you’re more likely to attract those that will treat you the same way that you do. When you truly love yourself, you show up differently and it’s reflected in the world around you.

How to Practise Self-Love

So, now that you know the why, HOW do you actually do it? What are some ways that you can consciously love yourself more? Below is a list of several ways that you can practise self-love in your life. If you’re just starting out on this journey, remember to take small S.T.E.P.S steps. (You can find the S.T.E.P.S Formula in edition #2)

Positive Self-Talk

Monitor your inner dialogue and replace negative self-talk with positive affirmations. Speak to yourself as you would speak to a loved one, with kindness and encouragement. If you wouldn’t say what you’re saying to yourself to your mother or your child, then why are you saying it to yourself? Consciously “Flip the script” whenever you have a negative thought. Choose an opposite, positive, empowering thought and repeat it several times to counteract the negative thing that you said to yourself. Remember to do this in a gentle and kind tone and manner.

Set Boundaries

Learn to set healthy boundaries that protect your energy and wellbeing. Saying no when necessary and prioritising your own needs is a crucial aspect of self-love. As a human being, you can do anything, but you can’t do everything, and that’s ok. So often, people put others first and then don’t fulfil their owns needs. This can lead to stress, resentment, unhappiness and all kinds of negative flow on effects in your life. When you do what you need to do for you, it’s actually so much easier to do for others more. The oxygen mask on a plane is a common analogy, but it’s perfect for the situation. There’s a reason why they tell you to fit your own oxygen mask before helping anyone else, even your child. You can’t help anyone else if you’re incapable of it because you haven’t helped yourself first.

Self-Care Rituals

Incorporate self-care rituals into your daily routine. Whether it's a relaxing bath, reading a book, or spending time in nature, find activities that bring you joy and relaxation. Your rituals don’t need to take a lot of time. A few minutes a day is better than zero minutes a day. You deserve it!

Practice Forgiveness

Forgive yourself for past mistakes and understand that everyone makes them. Holding onto guilt and regret can hinder your personal growth. Embrace forgiveness as a way for you to move forward. Louise Hay said, “Forgiveness is for yourself because it frees you. It lets you out of that prison you put yourself in.” In the famous words from the song from the movie Frozen, “Let it go!”. Now you have that song stuck in your head, don’t you? Sorry, not sorry…….. 🤣

Celebrate Achievements

Acknowledge and celebrate your achievements, no matter how small. Recognising your successes reinforces a positive self-image and boosts motivation. It makes it easier to do MORE of the things that you want to do to create a better you.

Practical Tips for Cultivating Self-Love

But wait, there’s more. Not a set of steak knives, no, but these last five will bring many more years of joy to your life than a set of steak knives. Do you remember those ads? Here’s Tim Shaw’s famous ad to give you a laugh and a blast from the past! 🤔🤣

Daily Affirmations

Start each day with positive affirmations. Statements like "I am worthy," "I am limitless," and "I am enough" can set a positive tone for the day. Make your own. Create positive affirmations for yourself that draw out your emotions. They have to MEAN something to you. They have to make you feel good. When you’re doing something that feels good, it makes it easier to do more of that, especially in the beginning when you’re creating the habit. If you want to know how to create a new habit easily, check out edition #9.

Mirror Work

Louise Hay teaches this life changing practice. It’s a simple, yet profound practice. You look yourself in the eyes in a mirror and tell yourself that you love you. It can be very confronting and uncomfortable the first time you do it. You may not even be able to tell yourself that you love yourself in the beginning. If that’s the case, tell yourself something that you love ABOUT you. There will always be at least one thing that you can honestly say that you love about yourself. The more you do it, the easier it will get and when you keep telling yourself how much you love about yourself, you will start to truly believe it. When you first start mirror work you plant the seed and by watering it each day with just a small amount of mirror work, you will nurture it into a gigantic tree that spreads it’s limbs out far and wide, starting from within you and spreading out to others all around you.

Mindful Meditation

Practise mindfulness meditation to connect with your inner self. Spend a few minutes each day focusing on your breath and letting go of negative thoughts. Edition #17 on mindfulness and edition #11 on meditation will help you to incorporate mindful meditation into your life more easily.

Gratitude Journaling

Keep a gratitude journal to remind yourself of the good things in your life. Writing down what you're grateful for can shift focus from what’s lacking to what’s abundant. If you would like some tips on how to incorporate gratitude into your life, check out edition #16.

Seek Support

If you need help, seek support from friends, family, or professionals. Sometimes, talking to someone can provide a new perspective and help reinforce your journey towards self-love. Especially if you’re just starting out on this path and are struggling to find things that you love about yourself. Ask someone that you love. They will tell you what they love about you which can be enough to get you unstuck and moving forward. Yes, you will still have some work to do, but getting started can quite often feel like the hardest part.

By practising self-love and being kind to yourself, it's possible to navigate life's ups and downs with greater ease and confidence. The world is a different place when you exist within it with a heart full of love for yourself. Every day on earth is a blessing to be cherished and being able to experience that fully starts with you and what you see within you.

Do you love yourself fully and unconditionally? Or is there still some work to be done?

Reader Spotlight

The following review was left by Robyn after reading “Reclaim Your Inner Goddess: 7 Steps to Unlocking Your Inner Goddess Through the Power of the Chakras”:

You can find out more about this book here.

Weekly Challenge

Your mission for this week, if you choose to accept it, is to do the following:

Dedicate at least 3 minutes each day to a self-love activity. This could be positive self-talk, a favourite self-care ritual, or writing in a gratitude journal. Track how these practices impact your mood and outlook by the end of the week.

If you need some help, feel free to hit reply - let’s help you get started if you’re stuck!

B ME Bites is deliberately sent on a Friday morning (Aussie time) so that where ever you are in the world, you have the weekend to give yourself the gift of implementing a small change towards a better you. What will that small change be? Is there a change that you have been trying to make and haven’t yet succeeded? Give it another go, applying the above - you can do it!

Resource Roundup

Here is a beautiful article written by Louise Hay. Warning: Tissues may be needed!:

Louise Hay also wrote a book titled “Mirror Work”, which you can find on Amazon. Below is a super short video of Louise taking people through the process:

Below is a resource list that has been created with you in mind. Whenever something new that could be helpful is discovered or created, it’s added to the list, so check it out from time to time. If you’re strapped for time, once you open the page below, click on Resource List in the top menu, then click on the “Health Tools” link for a list of items that could be helpful on your path to a better you.

The answer to this week’s trivia question is:

Thanks for reading and the hope is that you found something helpful inside this issue. If you did, remember to share it with others whom could also find it helpful, using this link: https://bmebites.beehiiv.com

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Hit reply and answer either 1,2 or 3, and, if the answer is 2 or 3, give the deets on what would make it a 1 for you!:

1. Loved it!

2. It was OK

3. Meh!

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Until next week, keep taking one S.T.E.P.S step at a time! (If you missed the issue explaining The S.T.E.P.S Formula, you can check that out here)

Warm regards,

Shari Ware Chief Encouragement Officer at B ME Bites

PS - Here’s a little Friday funny for you!

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